Corresponding Affection Can Be Hard

Each person might be attuned to demonstrate affection in different ways. For example: verbal affirmation, being present, physical intimacy, gifting, proactive help, respecting space.

Most people will have a few preferred channels to demonstrate affection, which may or may not be their most attuned channel to perceive affection from others. Some people might even be fluent in all of them.

Whatever the case, it can be hard to correspond a demonstration of affection in the same manner if it comes through a channel that is a bit underdeveloped on the receiving side. As with anything communication, the most important step is the first one: trying it. It can be awkward, uncomfortable, tiring at first; but that’s the only way to learn a new language. Try it, and count on the other person to be a forgiving tutor.

And also like learning a new language, it might sometimes be necessary to fall back into known terms. Going back and forth is natural. The important part is to not have the fallback be permanent. Combine Comfort With Effort.